Sunday, July 29, 2007

Monday, July 23, 2007

Everything that matters is here in this picture

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Happiness was lonely yesterday
For it lost its twin
A long time ago
And it stayed that way - half happy!
The road was twisted
It went uphill
I sat right at the top
Between heaven and earth
All was quiet - the hill, the wind and I
Bound forever in silence
Little joys held like gems
And some secrets in the eyes.

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Calvin and I

Calvin is always in a hurry..... The hurry is to have fun. His summer vacation is like life. Short! So we gotta have fun and we gotta have fun right now.

So I want to take that vacation I never took to go to goa with S, R, N. I ought to take leave and go visit R & S's new born or go meet nani. I never got that old property painted. I didn't go to Leh!

I want to hear my mom talk while we sit at marine drive and have chai!

I want my dad to show me his new shoes that he claims are the lightest ever made!

I want to listen to Nani ask a zillion questions about mobiles, planes, work. I just want hear her talk!

I want to go and see if Tenga Valley changed in the last fifteen years!

I want to see the sun rise above the valley enroute to Gowahati!

I am lucky I saw that million dollar smile on A's face when he got his new clothes and shoes and books.

Monday, July 9, 2007

The “Baghara Baigun” Vs “Chicken Supreme”

The center of my mothers house is the kitchen. Everything has evolved around it. My folks ensured that the most utilized room in our home is the dining room with the huge table occupying most of it. Everybody who visits us and shares a meal would realize that the way to my parents heart passes through the dining room. Both ma and dad are foodies. They love to talk about food. If one were to sit with us for a hearty meal (its always a hearty meal since my mother does not believe in shortcuts) one would be enlightened on the tastes and eating habits of people of various states (courtesy dads job), how the Hyderabadi Biryani differs from the Locknowi one, how the Baghara Baigun is a gastronomic wonder, why we prefer non oily food, how to get taste in low oil cooking, what to eat when you’re a heart patient and they would always welcome new recipes. Of course we’ve had visitors who had little interest in food; but surprisingly very few. Even they were treated to a large variety for my parents know of only one way of treating their guests – the royal way that passes through the dining room!

I don’t cook all that much. I tell myself that I don’t have time. That happens to be true for at least three days out of six (Huh! Or do we really have seven days in a week). I shudder at the thought of having a kid at home cause I fear I’d starve the poor thing to death or the kid would grow up and embarrass me on dining table conversation with my folks discussing not the bagara baigun of hyderabad but the delectable pizzas offered by Dominoes/ Pizza Hut or Smokin Joes and how the Chicken Supreme is made differently at each outlet!

S and I are very compatible. I don’t get the time to cook three meals a day and she doesn’t like to eat three meals a day. But then I feel guilty. I read the paper today and discovered that there is an entire generation of working women who have found ways and means (or meals!) to tackle the guilt. The easiest and the simplest way is outsourcing (And America didn’t teach us that). To find a lady who would not cheat/ steal/ who would come early morning and prepare our food. But I wish it was as simple as that.

Working along with Mom in the kitchen has taught me a lot of stuff. I know my mom would rather be a little late in serving the food than offering hastily prepared dishes. I realize that my long hours in the office are attributed to the same thing. This need to have everything just right compels me to be detailed and thorough in my work. But what I wonder is that is it possible to have results in the kitchen and office at the same time. I realize that there are only twenty four hours in a day. I have to prioritize – everyday!

A mans world is so much simpler. No babies, no cooking, no allergy to dirt in the farthest corner of the kitchen counter, probably the number of minutes it took for the bai to clean the entire house is not even registered anywhere. What joy!

I love men who don’t pressurize their better halves about the output of the kitchen while they sit scratching-you-know-what during channel surfing. The best way to love your wife/ girlfriend is to allow her the freedom to choose how she loves you. It may not involve the kitchen at all. Although most of my women friends when not under pressure naturally incline towards the kitchen.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

To S ...who knows what to ask.........

We left Pune amidst heavy downpour, The rain gods were at it good....

S & I were comfortably dry in the volvo.....

Both lost in our own worlds.... Already missing mum n dad.... who I am sure were feeling the same way.

Then in all innocence S turned to me and said... "Shaz..what have we done... in life"

That was not such a good topic to bring up..... Coz since then ... I have been troubled by it to no small measure.

"what have I done in life"..... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Sure ... theres a great job... a nice comfortable bank a/c.... everything everything... but ...... but ...

something is missing.....

If I were to leave the world tomorrow..... who would remember.... have I made a difference.... what have I given to this world which It didn't already have.....

Is there all there is....

Flashback: Age 11, Place: Kaluchak, Jammu

I was always excited..... I had so much to learning how to read the wall clock correctly, knowing how much change I should get from the grocery store owner, I knew every single patch of earth in my garden and all around my house, I knew every kid in the colony, I had to figure out the mystery behind those freshly ironed clothes that suddenly disappear from the bathroom and reappear in my closet, or I had to find that boy who was sitting near that button from where he controlled whether or not to send electricity in our colony...... I wanted to know what is the final end.... that if the universe didn't exist...what would be there?
Now, I don't know what my own country is like.... I haven't been to leh yet, I have only seen a handful of states, I don't know what Australia is like or the kind of food people eat in Africa.

The best years of our lives, S and I are spending in traffic jams and meetings and mumbai pune expressway.

I still haven't done any social work, I have stopped sketching, I manage a little bit of writing and thats all....

I don't remember the last time I made a new friend.....

Cause.... I am spending the best years of my life in traffic, meetings, and other stuff which nobody remembers....


So what will S and I do.......

We may not go to Australia but we may just run away to Goa or Kerela....... :)

And I will do that social work..... I will.... I will...... I will..........