Sunday, January 24, 2010

आउट ऑफ़ माई माइंड

एक ख़ामोशी की तलाश में चले जा रहे हैं हम
कभी अपने साथ कभी अकेले
कुछ नए से रस्ते
कुछ साथी पुराने

The mind is never still. Never quiet. I take deep breaths to make it still. Close my eyes and stay alert to the breath that enters my nose and leaves the same way. Seconds tick by. The eyes remain closed. My mind is an expert in drawing up images behind closed eyes. Realization of dreaming brings me back to my task of observing my own breath. Admonishing my clever mind to not think.
Its so hard... to not think. And so peaceful when I do so even if that state remains for few minutes. A blank mind that is aware of nothing but the body it occupies. That for me is bliss. The universe within is beautiful but seldom visited.
Being lonely and being alone are two very different things. I am with myself so much that I don't miss being alone. Yes I feel lonely in my own company sometimes. But such is life. And its beautiful.
Life is rich in experience. Time and years, thoughts and feelings, places, god and much more.
Even though I have an occupation, I am thinking that it should not be my identity. I am much more than what I do. Judgement, the fallacy of the human lot. We so often are quick to judge. An ability to accept without judgement is something that I struggle with and often fail. Someone who may not be making too much money, someone who doesn't have the best job on earth, someone who has so and so caste, religion. All these are boxes where we want to shove the people we meet. I hope I learn to consistently accept without judgement. Accept that which I do not like.


jolly said...

its very nice blog
Aman Toor

Kay said...

I know exactly how you feel. A blank mind is the only time we are fully aware.